


Three Hellblazer Poems

by CopperBeech



Category: Constantine: The Hellblazer (Comics), Hellblazer
Genre: Dangerous Habits, Don't copy to another site, I was weird in the 90's, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-11
Updated: 2019-12-11
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:20:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21748174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CopperBeech/pseuds/CopperBeech
Summary: Three poems in the voices of characters fromHellblazer, dating back to the mid 90s.And here I am in the Smoke, cleaning a pen nibAnd waiting for a winsome blond SassenachTo close another pub, and my greatest griefIs that even stone sober his tongue is so glibThat I will believe him when he promisesHe will hold me safe from an evil far worse than drink,And I will not see the fiend crouched in the cornerWhile his sweet smoky mouth covers my foolish face with kisses.





	1. John Constantine On The Bridge

**Author's Note:**

> I was a mad fan of Garth Ennis' tenure on _Hellblazer,_ and something of a regular in the letter column. One night, possibly due to brandy-laced decaf, writing poems in the voices of the major characters at the time seemed like a good idea. I had so much fun writing my GO/Hellblazer crossover "Funny Old World" that I fished them out. This may turn out to be another one of the things that seem like a good idea at the time.
> 
> Fun fact, the letter-writing led to a very ridiculous transatlantic romance with another fan from West London, involving things like The Welsh Breakfast That Made Me Flee Swansea and The Perilous Power Toilet Of South Dorset. It was fun to immortalize shreds of it in scene-setting for my Absent Without Leave series. Nothing is ever wasted.

The night exhales a compound stink  
In which, like a poncy wine-fancier,  
I can distinguish beer-vomit, the odd broken hymen,  
The nosebleed of some berk roughed up by a bouncer.

The phosphorous pungency of a match,  
Fluttering down to hiss opprobrium  
In the thick Thames, clears my palate and I draw  
The fume that intoxicates but does not cheer.

Homebound drunkards laugh at the two o'clock chime  
While I watch with narrowed vision  
The bit of a cardboard squat which I know harbors  
What would make drunkards howl and piss themselves.

London has devils aplenty, but only I  
Know which are brevet and which earned their place in the ranks:  
The current takes my fag-end, and grit  
Wakes my palms as I push back from the stones.

Tie loosened, collar turned up,  
Fists in pockets, I start toward my rendezvous,  
And wouldn't you bet your money, or maybe a kiss,  
On such a stylish scoundrel?

Cue the fiends, don't keep me waiting,  
I'd like an hour of kip before the landlady wakes me.


	2. Kit At The Easel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A late night musing of Constantine's sometime girlfriend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kit Ryan started out in the Hellblazer storyline as the onetime girlfriend of Brendan Finn, a magical colleague of John Constantine, and ended up with John after Brendan's death because some people just can't stay away from trouble. It didn't last, for reasons laced through the poem, but then it's Constantine's life, nothing ever does.

The pen is running dry of ink;  
Likewise the images behind my eyes  
Run dry, while I listen for another lad  
Coming home, as others have, half gone in drink.

The old man, whose fists were like knobkerries,  
Swung at my Ma once too often:  
Seeing the knife in my hand forced his eyes wide open --  
Drastic, but it put a stop to her worries.

I swore, then, much as I like my glass  
On a gay night or at end of a tiring day,  
I would never hide from the world in it, nor give  
My body to one who sheltered in such a place.

And here I am in the Smoke, cleaning a pen nib  
And waiting for a winsome blond Sassenach  
To close another pub, and my greatest grief  
Is that even stone sober his tongue is so glib

That I will believe him when he promises  
He will hold me safe from an evil far worse than drink,  
And I will not see the fiend crouched in the corner  
While his sweet smoky mouth covers my foolish face with kisses.


	3. Brendan Finn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brendan Finn's reflections in his last moments, as he drinks with Constantine and considers his odds of escaping Hell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brendan Finn's demise, during the Dangerous Habits storyline, involved some fancy footwork keeping his soul out of Hell's hands after originally selling it for a collection of the finest drink ever amassed. John and Brendan, both looking Death in the eye, get pretty trollied drinking from a pool of Holy Water (blessed by St. Patrick originally) that Brendan's magically turned into ale, and when the Devil comes to collect Brendan's soul, Constantine proposes a toast. Devil sinks a pint of Holy Water, game, set, match.

_Slainte!_ Raise your glass,  
Filled in defiance of evil:  
The man who drains his draught in Heaven's name  
As is well known, chases away the devil.

Friends come and go, and I admit  
The haze that comes twixt me and them  
Sometimes obscures their faces: never mind,  
Dip your beaker again, once more to the brim.

Some grapple with their destiny: I chose  
Irish inevitability;  
To drink out my days, till the flesh distils  
Into the dram of spirit's mystery.

It suited my Irish humor to strike a bargain  
With the Prince of Darkness, knowing somehow my back  
Was covered, though never sure which hand  
Would stop him plucking my soul from my body's wrack.

It's getting dark; an ugly draught  
Has been stirring the candles from time to time;  
Send the glass round again, and sing  
With thick tongue and roughened voice an Irish rhyme.

If I can't be safe in Heaven half an hour  
Before Old Nick knows I'm dead, I relish more  
That I'll be there, and pinching angels' bottoms,  
One perfect second before he knows he's done for.

**Author's Note:**

> Come say hello on Tumblr @CopperPlateBeech


End file.
